why you should date me; i’m 6’6 so if we go to concerts you can ride on my shoulders and see everything
if i was standing behind you and you were already tall to begin with and then you put someone on your shoulders i would KICK YOU IN THE SACK
i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat”
it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud
things said in majority of movies:
- "I TRUSTED YOU!!"
- "she’s not just some girl!"
- "I should have told you this a long time ago."
- "I’m not a little girl anymore!!"
- "but I love him!!"
-“You’re giving up your dream!”
“No dad, I’m giving up YOUR dream.”
"I knew your father. He was a good man."
*girl walks downstairs*
Guy: Wow… you look… great.
Ten rape prevention tips:
1. Don’t put drugs in women’s drinks.
2. When you see a woman walking by herself, leave her alone.
3. If you pull over to help a woman whose car has broken down, remember not to rape her.
4. If you are in an elevator and a woman gets in, don’t rape her.
5. When you encounter a woman who is asleep, the safest course of action is to not rape her.
6. Never creep into a woman’s home through an unlocked door or window, or spring out at her from between parked cars, or rape her.
7. Remember, people go to the laundry room to do their laundry. Do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.
8. Use the Buddy System! If it is inconvenient for you to stop yourself from raping women, ask a trusted friend to accompany you at all times.
9. Carry a rape whistle. If you find that you are about to rape someone, blow the whistle until someone comes to stop you.
10. Don’t forget: Honesty is the best policy. When asking a woman out on a date, don’t pretend that you are interested in her as a person; tell her straight up that you expect to be raping her later. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the woman may take it as a sign that you do not plan to rape her."
“why do humor bloggers even care if people from school find their blog, it’s not like you have anything to hide”